13.11.07
MOMENTS OF INTIMACY
OH YES, i have to mention that yating is not a mom. neither is the baby her brother.
and these photos were a bad attempt at trying to capture "family life".
pardon me for the uncolorful pictures.
seems so gloomy huh?
ahahah. but i figured too much of my posts had color in them.
went to yating's house yesterday.
and to Tiong Park as well.
i LOVVVVEEE tiong park.
it's super cool and fun.
i think i had memories there.
we had fun relieving childhood funs
going on the swings, slides, flying foxes, see-saws.
i love the swing.
the feeling of soaring into the skies and back down into earth again.
and the breeze blowing through your hair.
amazing feeling.
went for a jog as well.
four rounds around tiong park.
i got locked out of the house when i reached home.
no one was at home, and i had no keys.
do i sound calm?
yeah actually i WAS calm.
but i tried to pick the lock with my clip.
but well, it didn't work.
i did that for about half an hour before i gave up.
people might think i was trying to break in.
called everyone to talk to them.
and went down for a walk.
sheesh.
i don't know why im so incredulous.
jealous. doubtful.
it's a horrible thought.
but i realised that i am veryvery competitive.
as well as ambitious.
i don't like people to be better than me.
i sound conceited?
maybe.
i just have so much horrible thoughts.
i dislike people who are better than me.
maybe not dislike, but i feel an urge to be better than them.
in areas which i care about.
i think i am hated.
by some minority of people.
but inside of me, my self consciousness is telling me stuff.
like i have to be better than you.
crap. i sound childish.
like how we used to compare marks afetr the papers.
i know everything will turn out so much more than just fine.
because jesus favours me, us.
all of it. but sometimes, faith runs low.
bad days are evident...
hmmmmmm. i have high expectations of myself.
and i am somewhat a perfectionist.
sheesh. i better stop thinking about all these.
think about the movie later.
the bees will enetertain me.
i shall shut up for now. and let you decipher my meaning.
dance those blues away...